Norway is, definitively, the most expensive place I have ever been in my life. It’s a good thing that I didn’t have to pay for accommodation for two nights in Oslo. Instead we stayed with Alison’s 3rd cousin Ellen, a tall and well educated woman who lives just outside of the center of town. Ellen lives in a house that is semi-connected with her mother Liv. Her 18 year old daughter Matilda lives at home as well.
Fact: Ellen is the best hostess that I have ever encountered. She took us under her wing, fed us, cultured us, and offered us anything our hearts could desire. I got to try a new cheese (I’m not a big fan of Cheese in the first place) that was awesome. Norwegian cheese is sweet and looks exactly like peanut butter. I could eat it by the pound, it was so good.
Speaking of eats, we are headed to Bergen tomorrow where we will be able to sample rain deer, wale (which I am oddly ok with here in Norway, but passed on for morality issues when I was in Japan), and some other very unique foods.
Oslo is magical. It is undoubtedly my favorite place in Scandinavia, but I suspect it is because of how warm of a welcome we have received from Ellen and Matilda. We went to 5 museums today including one that is a tribute to the old Norway where people dress and act in a traditional manner. We also went to the Viking Museum which was ultra impressive. My favorite museum of the day was the FRAM. This was all about the first boat to reach the north pole and its many expeditions. The best part about this museum is that it was built around the ACTUAL boat. This enormous bulbous creature is actually open to walk inside of and see how the living conditions were.
But the most impressive place I went in Oslo by far was the Sculpture Park. This is a must do before you die. Put it on your list, it is magical indeed. There are tons of sculptures of humans interacting with each other in almost every possible emotion and state. Wait till you see the pictures of this place.
Oslo is a place that I would love to come back to and stay for longer. It is a true gem. But if you are planning on coming here, be prepared to be crushed by the price of food. A can of coke here can easily be $5.
BERGEN
Bergen, the second or third largest city in Norway is magical. This is a port town on thew west side of Norway. I know I was refering to Oslo as magical, but this place is much more. Dozens of cutely crafted houses line the steep cliffs that lead down to the bay. The mouth of the bay is where we got to sample wale and rain deer. Wale tastes a lot like steak. When you look at the pieces they have on display, you think that you are looking at the world’s largest rib eye. It cooks to a dark brown while the center remains crimson (wait till you see the pictures). I thought to my self, self, you could eat a few pounds of this stuff couldn’t you?
Rain deer was remarkably unremarkable seeing as it came in sausage form. Thats right folks, I’m going to tell it like it is, If something Isn’t amazing, I’ll let you know (or just not mention it). Speaking of unremarkable, there was a 2 hour detour that we took on another train (on the way to Bergen) and it was highly over rated. It’s claim to fame was that it has the steepest decent of any train in the world. Other than that, it was rather boring. I think actually that you could blame it on the weather though. The weather in Bergen was been a bit of shit. It has rained a bunch. Enough to the point that when it starts raining the locals will say “Finally! I thought it would never stop being dry again!” in a wonderfully sarcastic tone. Well that wasn’t the natives, that was the worldly immigrants that work in the fish market.
When you are walking though the fish market, you will hear 7-10 different languages being used because the people who work on the boats and in the booths are from everywhere from Argentina to Zambia. It’s wonderful. Walking through the tents everyone wants to talk to you about where you are from (but in a ultra low pressure maner) and then they inevitably want to give you samples of wale, salmon, rain deer and caviar. Trout caviar is my favorite 
There is a ton of spectacular hiking in and around Bergen. You can see some epic views of the city and surrounding fjords. Speaking of Fjords (the reason I came to Bergen), the weather didn’t permit it. That’s right, the weather was poring rain for the few days that we were here. Too bad. Put it back on the list. I’ll show you what I missed out on:
These two pictures are from Fjords that are actually not exactly where I was, but ones that I will return to eventually. Read the captions to find out more about them!
Norway was the most intriguing of all the Scandinavian countries and the most beautiful (from what I saw). All the capital cities main drags are about the same, but the country side are very different. It is likely that I have the most interest in Norway because of the people I have met and the extra time and places I saw. (But at the second that I am writing this section of this post, I am on a train going back to Oslo from Bergen and I promise you that it is the most scenic train ride you will ever go on. It’s way better than the 2 hour excursion.)
Before you go Scandinavia, please keep the 3 to 5 rule in mind. That is, you will spend between 3 and 5 times as much on an item of food (not particularly on housing) as at home. Sweden is the most reasonable of the countries then comes Denmark and finally Norway, but it is worth it. What’s really expensive? How about $60 for one course in a restaurant? Whale only costs $40 per pound.
I feel that I was skunked a bit in Norway because of the weather, but this is a place that I will be back to. If you are into the mountains and woodsy land (including tons of waterfalls and rivers), then Norway will be among the most beautiful places you will ever go. This place will stop your heart just long enough to remember you’ve got one. The Norwegians (among the rest of Scandinavia) will shock you in how perfect their English is.
Next time, though I don’t know how, I am going to stay here for a month.
Alright, in real time (of me typing this) I’ll tell you what I see: Deep, dark, placid lakes. Black rolling rivers. Puffy white wisps on tiny clouds, dancing along the surface of the water (we have a super high altitude). Steep green pastures that are dotted with trees and red & white houses. 300 foot waterfalls, thick forests. 1000 foot cliffs dressed in bright green. This is the kind of place that an author moves to for inspiration. Flooded patches of trees covered in moss. Wild red mushrooms. It’s overcast which is perfect. It ads the mystery. There are so many (I’m aware that this is an oxymoron) cosy cabins that are profoundly situated in idyllic isolation. This country is full of nooks and cranny’s that you will feel alone with nature. Next we ascend up past the tree line where the mountains turn white and don’t ever change for the course of history. This is all from the comfort of a train!!!!
Don’t forget, Norway invented the paper clip!
Tonight I fly from Oslo to Amsterdam. It was that or sit on a train for 40 hours (including two overnight trains costing $150 each (apparently my Rail Pass doesn’t cover those in Scandinavia)) , take a 16 hour ferry for $200 (and then have to take another 5 hour train, or take another 4 days getting back by taking my time. Time is not what I have a lot of (in Europe).
In True flash packer fashion, I fly (for half the price it would cost to do almost everything else. I am off to meet up with a few friends in Holland that I met in New Zealand. After that I will meet up with a Belgian friend that I met in Australia and Thailand. Then after that with Patrick my step brother in Paris. Then a German friend that I met in Australia. Then a Swiss friend that I met in Australia. Ya, you could say that my global network is maturing
BACK IN OSLO FOR A FEW HOURS
I’m back in Oslo for a few hours before my flight out to Amsterdam and of course, my friend who I met in Australia, Marthe, cooked me dinner in true Norwegian fashion. We talked about the price of food as well as some Norwegian stereotypes. She says that the reason food is so expensive is because EVERYTHING needs to be shipped in. She said that she often drives over to Sweden (less than an hour away) to stock up on food because it is so much more cheaper. Also, Norwegians are known for smelling like milk as well as sounding like they are singing when they speak. The milk stereotype comes from the old times when people’s diets consisted of mostly milk products. This is before, of course, the high speed super tanker that can bring in anything the heart can desire (for 3-5 times the price). Norway started with hospitality and ended on the same note. Thanks Marthe!