(In an assuming tone)
Q: Why are you really coming to Australia?
A: Holiday.
Q: Well, how long have you been planning this trip?
A: A few months.
Q: So you must have done some real planning.?
A: Not really, I’m going to 32 countries this year. Micro managing that is impossible. Plus, it’s more fun if you didn’t read the script before you watch the play.
Q: So what types of attractions do you have at the top of your list?
A: I don’t know, Australia! The beaches, the people, you know kangaroos and stuff.
Q: Do you know someone here in Sydney?
A: Um, Ya. I have an ex roommate that is out here studying abroad.
Q: Where are you going after this?
A: Thailand.
Q: Do you know someone out there?
A: As a matter of fact, I do. Another ex-roommate studying abroad. (Even I was becoming suspicious of myself at this point. My story does sound made up).
Q: Do you have any traveler’s checks on you or personal checks? (As she is rummaging through all of my belongings).
A: Yes
Q: How much?
A: $150. Most of my money is accessed with banks cards.
Q: How much money do you have in the bank? (followed by about 40 more questions)
A: None of your fucking business (I thought) and now I will be calling my lawyer/the US military to unleash the greatest force the world has ever known (I thought).
My blood sugar was low and I didn’t feel like being treated like a criminal. I told her “after you are done searching my bag and find out that I don’t have anything to hide, do you mind sharing with me the reason you flagged me so that I can avoid future molesting?” She said “we can’t share what we use as criteria.” Of course, I answer 50 of your questions and you can’t answer just one for me. Australia is so freaking selfish.
To make things more ironic, this was a woman covered in traditional Muslim attire (covered in a shawl) working for customs. Perhaps she saw that I was American and wanted to repay the favor that one of my customs officers put her through for how she was dressed. Nothing like paying the hate forward.
I wanted to tell her that I didn’t have time to stay in her retched country for more than a few months and that the world was waiting. Her country (no matter how heartbreaking it was) was only a small piece to the mission. And the mission came first. (I still haven’t eaten since then, and my blood pressure is still low. It makes for a better post.)
Sydney so far is about what I expected: a city for the people and the tourists. There are a LOT of real Ausies here and because of that, there is a certain degree of assumption when it comes to getting around. Everything is a little less user friendly. The people are a little less friendly and care a little less. The time Zone is 2 more hours away from home (for a total of 5 now). It was what I expected. Not the city that you will be mugged in, but not Auckland. A perfect progression into the real traveling.
My training wheels are off and though I’m not doing back flips out of the pipe, I’m definitely riding dirty (what does riding dirty mean?) (I always wanted to say it 